It was a typical humid summer camp meeting night in Flovilla, Georgia. The speaker at the tabernacle had just preached on serving the poor. My friend Chaslee and I were convicted as fourteen-year-olds, and decided to take necessary steps to live out the Gospel as best we could, being young'in's in high school. We had happily chosen to support a child through Compassion International. Representatives were present at the camp meeting, and displayed on tables hundreds of packets of children's profiles from ages four to fourteen from all nationalities.. their faces just calling your name and asking you to "sponsor me". Chaslee and I chose a nine-year-old pretty girl from Indonesia. The packet appropriately told us she was a good student, she lived with her mother, and it included some of her hobbies as well. We decided we could combine baby-sitting money and make this actually happen. So, we asked our parents, they consented, and we were ready to have a new friend.
Later that night, we were walking back down to where the table displays were, and every packet had been taken. What a miracle! All those children were about to be given education, medicine, food, and most importantly, the Gospel!
And then... a man walked up to me. He had a packet in his hands. This was the only packet that had not been selected. He was trying to find anyone and everyone to sponsor this little black Colombian boy. I read his information. His name was Jose, he wasn't doing too well in school, he was six years old... that means I'd have to support him for a long while... his picture almost looked like he was pouting... I declined the invitation to sponsor. But this man pleaded with me. He took a look at my purse and asked me how much it costed, and then told me that instead of buying a purse I could support a child for a month. I mean, this man was being on the verge of bothersome. But, having no backbone, I took the packet, sighed, and tried to think how I could pay for a second child.
I wish I could find that man now and thank him for annoying the heck out of me. It didn't take long for me to realize that Jose was one of the biggest blessings for me in my life.
He was mine. He was my child. I would write him during class in the ninth grade, I would draw him pictures, and he would draw pictures back. It didn't take me long to realize he was one of the prettiest children I had ever seen. I loved nothing more than when Compassion would send me a photo update, and I could see how much he had grown. He always had the same expression on his face, his bottom lip pouting a little bit, lips closed, big bright eyes. I'm assuming he was missing some teeth, and that's always why he pouted. He always stood up straight like a tall, proud, man. He knew who he was. He told me about when he would visit his grandmother in the neighboring village, what he was learning about Jesus, his favorite Bible verses, always thanking me and telling me he loved me and was praying for me.
I started to pray for him everyday. Letters are one of those things that make me happy, but when he sent me letters, it made my week. We would write about every other month to each other.
His most recent letters included phrases like:
"You are very special to me"
"Please pray hard for me"
"I love you very much-- receive hugs and kisses!"
"God is good to me, and I thank him, I have everything I need"
"I thank God because I am growing"
"I look forward to your letters"
"I miss you"
"I would really like for you to visit"
Can I just say, this little child knows where to push my emotional buttons? I can't think of a sweeter, more genuine child. His most recent letters brought me to tears.
His last request, for me to come visit, was something that had been on my heart for the past year. There is a sponsor trip going in October, and I was trying to find every way to save up my money and go see my boy.
Nine days ago, I received a phone call.
Jose's family has moved him to another village where there is no Compassion sponsor site. Compassion communicated to them that Jose could no longer be sponsored if they moved away. The family took this under consideration when they made the decision to move locations.
I was a wreck. I couldn't stop crying all weekend. That was my child. I was going to see him. He loved me. He was the one child I cared more about than any other. I prayed for him everyday, had his picture in my wallet. And now it's all over?
Communication with Jose was cut off. It was his birthday a couple of weeks ago. That was probably the last package he got from me.. if it got there on time. He just turned twelve years old... Wow. He's so big. He was only two years younger than I was when I started to sponsor him.
Through this past week, though, as upset as I've been for letting go of my favorite boy, the Lord's peace has reigned in my heart. He has spoken to me through this situation.
"Sarah, if you love this child this much, can you even imagine how much I love you?"
Through my concern about where Jose has gone, if he'll be okay, my disappointment in the fact that I can't talk to him, the Lord has shown me his feelings for his children-- How much he wants to talk to us, how he doesn't want anybody to move us away or block communication, how we are His.
The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away. What an amazing blessing that this pouting, unchosen, beautiful Colombian boy turned out to be. We both have experienced the Lord's blessings through this relationship. Through my sponsorship with Jose, God has reaffirmed in me his calling for me to care for the unchosen, picked-through children of the earth. He was given me the confidence to see that no other field of work will be as satisfying as making relationships with children who need the Lord Jesus.
Thank you, Lord. Through it all, thank you.
